I often like to talk about the things that this journey is teaching me. One of the most common things it teaches me about trauma and how it shows up in my life every day. Trauma is real! Beyond this revelation, I am discovering that trauma is not only real, it shapes us, and can drastically affect the way that we experience life. When we have trauma of any kind in our history, we have challenges hearing what is truly being communicated to us in real-time. Instead what ultimately happens is we hear through our "trauma filter". Hearing through these trauma filters can be devastatingly damaging to relationships, and is actually more common than we may think.
My wife and I have been married for a while now and our relationship is helping me learn this concept more with each passing day. Sexual trauma left me with the stain of feeling perpetually unheard. This is an energy that I have been trying to shake since realizing it during my late teen years. Therefore, when my wife and I argue (as all married people do), I have to hear past my own trauma. This means that I have to sometimes